you're not (a real) chinese!

I am agog.
I am aghast.
For those of you who know of Agog and Aghast, what a cute Les Miz connection, eh?

Last night, whilst awaiting my take out dinner of Mini Chicken Katsu at the local Hawaiian BBQ restaurant, I made small talk with the proprietor. I know from previous conversations with this woman that she was born in Hong Kong, raised in Hawai'i, now living on the mainland and running a business. I also know that she is not a big celebrant of holidays.

Quote: 'Thanksgiving?!? I don't eat turkey. I don't like cook those foods. It's not my holiday. I don't care'.
Quote (my personal fave of all her declarations about holidays): 'Why Merry Christmas?!? Whot foh?!? Whot foh?!?'

BBQ Lady can be rather abrupt, but we usually manage some meaningless chitchat during the 5 minute wait for my order to be prepped. This particular evening, she and I happened on the topic of having a Chinese name. I told her my 6 month old DollinkGrandDaughter was given a Chinese name, and that both my DollinkDaughters had one too, as did I.

BBQ Lady looked at me incredulously, then firmly stated
that it was IMPOSSIBLE for me to have a Chinese name, because....well....she said...that I wasn't a real Chinese.

'But I am a real Chinese', says I.
I'm A.B.C., grew up in San Francisco, in the Chinatown 'hood', I added....a feeble attempt to further emphasize my authenticity.

'NO', she repeated.
'You are American and not Chinese and you can't have a Chinese name', she retorted - then continued her harangue by insisting, 'Because you are not a real Chinese' (or not Chinese enough, or something to that effect)....as if I didn't quite get it.

Truth be told, I really wasn't getting it.
My first reaction was to be offended, but in reality, this entire scenario was borderline ironic and/or funny, considering the source(s).

The fact is that I am far more accustomed....though am never ever thrilled when I hear....in fact I take issue with...
those who identify me as 'Chinese' before they take into any consideration of me as an AMERICAN (who happens to be of Chinese descent).

Besides being politically incorrect, this blind labeling is cheap shot, cop-out, never no mind about history, an asinine assumption borne of stupidity, ethnocentric beliefs....
....whoa there now....really, I shouldn't get started...

During our exchange, both BBQ Lady and I tried to keep it lite.
All along, she thought I was kidding when I insisted that I was Fo' Real Chinese.
I thought she was kidding by persisting that I was not.
As the moments wore strenuously on, I realized that neither of us was funning the other; that we were both headstrong steadfast in the seriousness of our individual conviction.

When my チキンカツ was ready, I grabbed the bag, hightailed out the door and left her repeating as I walked away that it's simply not (Ha Ha) right for me to have a Chinese name.
I kept calling back in her direction '(Ha Ha) but I do, but I do'....

Once back in my car I chuckled, then released a rather hearty laugh.
After which, I thought to myself (and probably said aloud) - 'WTF?!?'

Not a Real Chinese, eh?
Having lived in areas where I am frequently identified as The Chinese One, I struggle to educate the masses, often pontificating on deaf ears, unwilling perspectives and/or unyielding frame of references.
It shouldn't matter, but when ignorance abounds, it does.
Living for generations in a country that family and I call home; there are still far too many days when I feel the need to wear a button, tee-shirt or sign stating 'All American Girl' - because too many of y'all out there just don't seem to know that.

And then last night, of all Hallow'd Eves (Gung Hay Fot Choy New Year), indeed - one of my own messes with me.

Me, b.
Made In America.
4th generation (from Gum Sahn gold seekers).
Longtime Californ', to boot.

No small wonder I am an Angry Little Asian Girl.